“The executive branch is holding Trump hostage and trying to wait out the election hopeful to have a change in congressional power. This preserves their institutions and executes their goals. It is the legislative branch who are trying to help the President and force the officials within the cabinet to admit the corruption.”
I’m going to copy some comments from the original post here as food for thought. What tipped me to include them was “Wolfmoon’s” “like” of one of these posts…& I usually consider Wolfmoon & Fleporeblog & BigMamaTEA to be well-reasoned commenters…
Sundance of the Conservative Treehouse provides an extremely comprehensive review of the known facts with analysis & reasonable supposition regarding many of the chess pieces & moves of this complex, incompetent, & likely corrupt enterprise. Please see the original post!
“Looking at the historical timeline, and knowing the contacts developed, gives a great perspective into what would have spurred the CIA/State Department to set up a more expansive presence and operation in the coastal region of Eastern Libya May/June 2012.
The official U.S. State Dept Libyan presence was vacated on Feb 25th of 2011 when the embassy personnel were evacuated. Stevens was re-establishing the diplomatic office and acting as Ambassador to Libya during the 2012 reconstruction phase.
What we did not know at the time was that Chris Stevens was also acting as the facilitator for U.S. arms shipments OUT OF LIBYA, through Turkish diplomatic couriers and into Syria. While coordinating a second covert action to arm the Syrian resistance.
A very strong argument can easily be made that Chris Stevens was a CIA operative inside the State Department. Many people within the State Department are CIA personnel using the State Dept as part of their visible cover.”
“The Syrian opposition had three al-Qaida arms operating within it. Including one that also operated in Libya:
It would be into this eclectic mix of Jihadist ideologues, which later became ISIL, that any diverted U.S. arms would flow. It’s no wonder that Senator John McCain was so confused when he was calling them “moderates” in 2012/2013. Almost no-one knew the severe elements in Syria would rise to the surface and become the modern ISIS now capturing all of the global attention.”
“And…. If you just realized…. Yes, ISIS or ISIL currently on the march in Iraq, came from Syria, fought in Syria and more than likely was armed by the U.S. inside Syria and Turkey.
They were more likely trained, in Adana, a city in southern Turkey about 60 miles (100 km) from the Syrian border, which is also home to Incirlik, a U.S. air base where U.S. military and intelligence agencies maintain a substantial presence; by the same CIA operatives used by the State Dept to send Syria weapons from Benghazi and Darnah back in Libya.
If Operation Zero Footprint in Libya was stupid, arming the Syrian branches of al-Qaeda two years after the FSA was thoroughly corrupted by al-Qaeda, is infinite degrees beyond stupid.
But that’s hindsight for ya….. or as Secretary Clinton would say “Whether they were, … at this point, what difference does it make?””
“The entire weapons operation 2011 was labeled “Operation Zero Footprint”. The intent is outlined in the operational title – to leave no visible record of U.S. involvement in arming the Libyan “rebels”. No visible footprint.
We know from congressional inquiry Ambassador Chris Stevens had asked for more security in the months prior to Sept. 11th 2012. Requests sent to the State Dept that were denied.
We also know that NO MARINE DETACHMENT was ever put in place to defend the Benghazi Mission.
We also know the Benghazi Mission was initially, and mistakenly by media, called “a consulate”, or a “consulate outpost”. But there was no State Dept record of any consulate office in Benghazi.
All of these seeming contradictions can be reconciled with the simple understanding that this “Mission” in 2011 was unofficial. Remember the goal – No visible footprint.
We also know the Second Operation, in 2012, to arm the Syrians’ was also covert – No visible footprint.
Why were security requests denied? Remember the goal – No visible footprint.
We know from General Carter Ham (AFRICOM Commander now retired) the Department of Defense was not even aware the State Dept was operating a mission in Benghazi during 2012. Remember the goal – No visible footprint.
How could Hillary Clinton, Charlene Lamb, or Patrick Kennedy approve or request a marine security detachment knowing the entire mission around both Benghazi operations was covert?
Such a request would have traveled outside the small group of State/CIA insiders. The request would have gone to DoD. Short answer, they couldn’t.
Hence the disconnect between what seemed to be obvious and/or simple questions and the inability to accurately discuss in the public venues of congressional inquiry.
To the public Chris Stevens was a U.S. ambassador, a diplomat. To the folks inside the State Dept and CIA, Chris Stevens was a U.S. Ambassador, AND a CIA operative coordinating covert arms sales.
In 2011 those arms shipments were to aid the Libyan rebels, in 2012 those same arms were redirected to aid the Syrian rebels.
Even after death the public face of Chris Stevens, the official role, was the only role able to be discussed. The covert, or unofficial role, was not. Again, we see the disconnect between inquiry that could be answered, and inquiry that could not be answered. Many irreconcilables surface because of this intelligence role – even through today.
The second role of Stevens, the covert and CIA aspect, still causes problems for people trying to understand the “why not” questions. The broader public asking why have we not seen, or heard from the survivors of the attacks?
The short answer is:
we have not heard from the survivors – but the intelligence community has.
Twice some of the survivors have given testimony to congress. The problem for the public is that those hearings are closed door, classified, intelligence hearings – led by then Chairman Mike Rogers and the Permanent Select Committee on Intelligence.
Again, go back to the beginning of Operation Zero Footprint and you see the congressional Intelligence Gang of Eight were fully aware of the intents.
The Gang of Eight in 2011 / 2012 was: House Speaker – John Boehner, Minority Leader – Nancy Pelosi; House Permanent Select Committee on Intel Chairman – Mike Rogers, and his Democrat counterpart Charles Ruppersberger; Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, and Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid; along with Senate Intel Chair Diane Feinstein and her Republican counterpart, Saxby Chambliss.
Why was Speaker Boehner reluctant to establish a Select Committee on Benghazi ?
Simple, again he is one of the Gang of Eight – and he was briefed on both operations. How is he going to call for a select committee to investigate when he knows the substance of the committee investigation is classified under national security. Such a committee would not, because it could not, deliver what the public was requesting, sunlight.”
Back to the FALL of 2012 – On September 5th/6th 2012 the Turkish vessel “Al Entisar” docked in the Turkish port of Iskenderun. 400 tons of serious cargo including weapons destined for Syrian “rebels”.
In the U.S. that September 5th night former President Bill Clinton was introducing Candidate Barack Obama at the DNC convention in Charlotte North Carolina. In Afghanistan that night something happened that had already become a serious concern for the operatives within “Operation Zero Footprint”.
At the exact time Clinton was speaking in North Carolina, halfway around the world in Afghanistan Army Chief Warrant Officers Thalia S. Ramirez, 28, of San Antonio and Jose L. Montenegro Jr., 31, of San Juan, in the Rio Grande Valley, were killed while flying an OH-58D Kiowa Warrior, a Defense Department news release stated.
On September 5th 2012 – A U.S. organized ship loaded with weapons including missiles was offloading at a Turkish port. Bill Clinton was introducing Barack Obama, and the first black female combat pilot was shot down and killed by a shoulder fired missilein Afghanistan.
The relationship between the three events reflects the absolute political fear that revolved around Operation Zero Footprint.”
“From 2002 through 2010 Combat Operations saw zero occurrences of SAMS, Stingers, or MANPADS in general.
Within months after delivering weapons to the Benghazi and Darnah rebels (May, June and July 2011) we began facing MANPADS in Afghanistan.
Four instances in late in 2011 including the 22 lives lost in what came to be known as Operation “Extortion 17”.
In 2012 it got worse, much worse: June 1st AFGHANISTAN:
A combined patrol discovered a weapons cache containing three shoulder-fired, surface-to-air missiles, three anti-tank mines, 423 RPGs, 118,600 7.62 mm rounds, 30 rifles and other ordnance in the Tarin Kot district of Uruzgan province. The cache’s contents were destroyed.(link)
We had a serious problem and it was picking up speed exponentially. June 6th 2012 we lost another crew. July 25th 2012 yet another. August 16th 2012 again more losses. September 5th 2012 more deaths. It just kept getting worse.
By September 5th 2012 in the preceding nine months we had lost 11 helicopters to shoulder fired missiles in Afghanistan. The following headline hit the media:
One of the incidents revealed details of what was being faced. The July 25th 2012 downing of a CH-47 which was found to have been hit with a “new generation” stinger missile. The risks were no longer mere worries, they were real:”
& finally we get to a possible motive for the Russia Collusion story, hmm?
“…. Which also takes a person to accept that Egypt (Sisi) and Jordan (Abdullah), are now very close with Russia’s Vladimir Putin. Much closer than they have ever been historically. That relationship also carries the very real potential to explain why there is additional vitriol between Clinton and Obama toward Putin.
Putin could very well be in possession of all the information about everything outlined above. AND be very smug in his knowledge that at any time he could use this information to leverage Clinton and/or any of the characters that surround Clinton who participated in the Libyan and Syrian operations.”
Today is another anniversary of the horrific attack on America that happened 9-11-01. I did not lose anyone in these attacks but was impacted by the events & their aftermath. For me I look at those attacks somewhat like our generation’s Pearl Harbor.
Each year as another September 11th approaches my family makes a concerted effort to remember & reflect. We tell our version of our events to our kids, who were all very young children on that terrible day, so they have limited direct personal memories.
We usually check out various books & movies from the library that share aspects of those events & things that subsequently happened. We make a concerted effort to not look away from the horror & tragedy & to prayerfully & respectfully reflect & remember.
Here are some things that have been impacting us over the years & can help us to understand the events, at least from the point of view of their creators:
After doing this post originally on 9-11-18 I ran across some further material of interest & wanted to share it here (I haven’t reviewed every aspect of each item shared below, so am providing these links as an FYI, not Endorsing the viewpoints)…
This first is a lengthy but moving article that outlines many aspects of the life of one of the heroes of 9-11, a man who sacrificed his life getting people out of the South Tower & chose to do one more sweep looking for people needing help to escape & so was on the 10 floor around the time of the collapse. Worth Reading!!!
Following are some snips from the comments section to this post:
After exhausting the comments section of the 9-11 post I’m looking for further gems from the CTH Open Thread here:
Now I’m reviewing some of Stella’s 9/11 themed pages starting here:
Now checking this post of Stella’s:
Father Mychal Judge.
For his boys.
For his city.
For his God.
The two videos above were from other Stella posts, then from this post:
Hoping to find further gems here:
from the transcript of the above video:
“As Commander-in-Chief, I will always do everything in my power to prevent terrorists from striking American soil.
Here with us today is Dorothy Garcia Bachler. Her husband Sonny was one of the passengers on Flight 93. On September 11th, 2001 — just over a month after their 32nd wedding anniversary — Sonny was on his way back from a business meeting. He called Dorothy — who he loved so much — called her on the plane and uttered her name before the line went dead silent.
In the days after the attack, Dorothy told the investigators there was only one thing she wanted from this field: her husbands wedding ring. They would know it by the inscription etched inside. All my love, it said, followed by the number 8/2/69 – the date of their anniversary. The officers — great people — promised to try. But in this field of wreckage, it seemed certainly impossible.
Dorothy began to pray, and she asked her friends to do the same. Days went by, then months. Still no ring. A week before Christmas, on December 19th, she heard a knock at the door. Two officers were standing with a — really beautiful to her — she saw it was so beautiful; she knew what was happening — a beautiful, small white box. Inside it was a wallet, a luggage tag, a drivers license, a small bag with the wedding ring inscribed with those three precious words: All my love.
Those words echo across this field. And those words tell the story of 40 men and women who gave all their love for their families, their country, and our freedom.
To Dorothy, and to every family here today, America will never forget what your loved ones did for all of us. (Applause.)”
Recently I encountered the comprehensive blog Different Dream Living–DifferentDream.com, run by Jolene Philo & was able to post many links to my writings related to special needs which I wrote about here:
She also has run a series that appears to be related to PTSD & Special Needs Parenting…of which I’ve only yet read one of the 13 installments. I have a tendency to play the “approach avoidance” game with myself whenever getting close to those things or people in my life that are most associated with pain…& special needs parenting is a big domain fraught with many conflicting emotions & unresolved baggage.
I had a relatively recent conversation with a hospital chaplain where she pointed out that many parents who have dealt with a complex special needs child have Trauma related issues. I’ve also been told by a couple of respected sources that both my special son, Josiah, & myself may carry a form of PTSD, in particular in relation to some of the damage & fallout from a failed special education battle on his behalf…see here:
Anyway I’ve decided to attempt to tackle the PTSD series en masse & write down my thoughts as they occur…hopefully in just this one post. So I’m basically taking a big breath & diving in so we’ll see where this journey (always in God’s hands) will take me/us. I hope/pray that if you wrestle with any of these issues you may be blessed in this raw sharing of where I am in this “facing the giants” journey. May God cover us in his love, peace, & healing presence as we venture into the unknown…
My plan going forward is to clip relevant sections of the various posts & share my insights & then maybe go back through the entirety of this post & intersperse some scripture images to add a bit of flavor & then post it “as is”…we’ll see…So I am actually attempting to polish this up a bit & am using bold &/or italics to highlight certain things. This means that some of the “clipped” verbiage may appear in a slightly different presentation than that at the original post sites. Please consider visiting the original posts for more info…
Here is the link to the first post in the series:
This first post details some of the results of a survey completed by some of the blog readers related to PTSD & special needs parenting. There is statistical info on individual questions & then details about when PTSD might have first begun…I’m already finding myself emotionally detaching from the topic as I read the various responses as detachment is apparently one of my main coping mechanisms with the pain. I also find that I relate to many of the answers shared like those below; I’ll just leave the answers that are mine too–sort of, they are various parts of my “trauma” not necessarily the Initial part though; I ended up leaving a couple of comments that aren’t Completely my experience (never had a C-Section, not reported to CPS, never “diagnosed” w/ anxiety):
When did your initial traumatic experience occur?
Here are the comments parents left in the box:
Also, though I often appreciate reading about other people’s experiences when they hover very close to those sore spots in the soul it can use up A Lot of energy reserves just to consider those external events, let alone to brush against the pain lurking just below the surface…
“Did the Survey Results Surprise You?
Here’s what surprised me about these results….the number of parents dealing with PTSD for a long period of time without treatment or support. This makes me very sad because treatment is available and effective. So in addition to the stories survey participants will be contributing to this series, considerable time will be devoted to effective treatments and how to locate them.”
Here the Dealing for a long time without support is kind of what jumped out at me. For many years I’ve felt guilty whenever I attempt to talk about the various traumatic aspects of caring for a complex special needs child/son. Most people don’t understand where I’m coming from so have a limited frame of reference. Other people can only hang briefly with my communication style…Often it feels as if people would rather turn away & pretend there are no battles/burdens that others face than try to “come alongside to help”…I’m also guilty of turning away from others’ pain so I do get it…
I honestly don’t know if there is “available & effective” treatment or not. Part of “available” for me includes financially accessible, so that is always a big hurdle. Also, because of the complexity of my son’s needs & the overarching way his issues have overshadowed my (& my family’s) life I have a hard time believing there is any liklihood of finding a “therapist” that might “get it” & also be skilled in navigating my Christian perspective…anyway it remains to be seen if “treatment” will ever be approached.
Here is a telling comment to the original article:
“Thank you for bringing this topic into the light. As a medical professional I have seen the panic in the eyes of the parents of my patients. But then I made my journey to the other side of the bed as a parent of a chronically ill child. I’ve been saying for years that this is a very real issue and that more research needs to be done. I’m considering obtaining my doctorate so I can do more research on this topic. It is personal and real. Thank you for opening the door for so many who are not only dealing with a chronically ill child but also struggling as a caregiver.”
& another comment:
“It does seem to not only be a Different Dream but at Different World a lot of the time! 19 emergency surgeries for my son prior to 3 years old and the triggers that come from everywhere and nowhere. Years of functioning with no emergencies and adapting to the reality but then out of the clear blue back in the stuck mode of hopelessness and helplessness and shear terror that comes when the dose of reality is more than usual. I remember when the Twin Towers fell thinking that is how I feel every time my son has an emergency or I sense things are heading in that direction. Thanks for this blog, it really allowed me to know I am not alone in my feelings and this Different Journey in life. Knowing there was peace for a while gives me hope there will be peace again.“
We thankfully haven’t faced the emergency surgery route but the many surgeries, & the majors (2 open heart, brain tumor, & liver transplant) have been especially challenging to cope with. My husband & I just watched the 9/11 documentary by the Naudet brothers last night (it’s nearing that anniversary again) so the Twin Towers perspective of the above comment strikes home. After 9/11 I was personally changed in how I approach & process news & information. After having a special needs child my whole perspective on life was radically altered. Both are watershed moments from which there is no escape!
& another comment:
“I have been telling my doctor for months that I am losing my mind, my control, my ability to captain this ship. I get pats on the back and told that I am doing an amazing job and no one could manage what I manage any better, or probably as well as I do. AHEM. Does any sound come out of my mouth when I speak? lol. DROWNING, NOT WAVING HERE! I recognize what I’m experiencing as PTSD from being diagnosed from a traumatic event long before I had children. – you know, a couple of lifetimes ago. I had no idea it could be caused by caring for a chronically ill child(ren). Everything I can find talks about single events such as injuries or illnesses with treatments/cures…
it’s relentless. And at the moment, there is no treatment, there is no cure, there’s no light at the end of the tunnel, there are no answers, no “one day when this is all over” to look forward to…. so it’s not really “POST Traumatic Stress Syndrome”…. Not sure what you might call it. “Constant Traumatic Stress Syndrome”? But this series is as close as I have found to relating to our situation. Thank you for writing it.”
I’m clipping that comment because it impacts me & I relate but there are really no words that I can come up with to articulate how…
The author’s reply to the above comment (there are details of the complex situation at the website post) may be beneficial to any of you on Facebook (I’m not)…
Here’s the second post (& these remaining posts may be from various willing parents who participated in the PTSD survey):
“A few hours after our first child’s birth in 1982, he was life-flighted to a hospital 750 miles away for life-saving emergency surgery. For the next 4 years, my mother hen instincts were absorbed in caring for my little chick. Life felt like a revolving door as my husband and I watched him go in and out of the doctor’s office, in and out of the hospital, in and out of surgery way. That revolving door left very little time for self-examination or working through the trauma I had experienced after his birth.
So I shut the door to my emotions and kept them safely under lock and key for years–even decades–after our son’s health stabilized. Those emotions remained stuffed away until 2008 when our son, then 26, was treated for PTSD caused by all the early, invasive medical trauma he had experienced.
I was sitting in the trauma clinic’s waiting room minding my own business when one of the therapists stopped by to visit about our son’s progress. After confirming that our boy was progressing well, the therapist looked me in the eye and asked, “What about you, Mom?”
I had no idea why he was asking the question. “I’m fine,” I replied, puzzled.
He raised a quizzical eyebrow. “Is that so?”
For several years I ignored his question whenever it niggled in my brain. But then last fall, something happened to someone I love dearly, and that event unlocked the door to my emotions. Long hidden emotions came tumbling out. Once again I felt as alone and weak and helpless as the day the doctor took my newborn baby away. I felt stuck in the past, unable to move beyond the constant sense of worry and loss surrounding me.”
Well I can definitely relate to the spirit of this post if not the specific details. I do recall a couple of times in my life where someone reached out to me in compassion, caring, & sensitivity where I was almost emotionally undone by their loving concern. It was such a rare experience to find that someone was also concerned with where I was (as opposed to only caring about Josiah’s needs) that I really didn’t know how to handle it (as in my armor was inadequate to combat the compassion!)…I’m not yet ready to look for treatment, per se, but am exploring this PTSD topic in the manner of “physician heal thyself”, including in this present post–obviously!
Here are Jolene’s suggested steps for those seeking/needing treatment:
If you think special needs parents and PTDS are living side by side in your life, I urge you to seek treatment. Follow these steps to find a therapist:
Now we’ll see if anything might jump out from the comments section:
Jolene mentioned getting help from Eye Movement Desensitizing and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy…http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/emdr-what-is-it
one of the commenters mentioned these techniques:
“I use EFT (emotional freedom technique) and NET (neuroemotional technique) to neutralize traumas. I find EFT helpful when the trauma is happening, and I’m getting worked up. I find NET helpful for past happenings.”
Here is the link to Part 3 of the series:
That image reminds a bit of Josiah after his first Heart Surgery at 2 months of age & 4 pounds…not a place I really want to re-visit…
“Adrenaline rush, adrenaline rush, adrenaline rush.
I was young. I was strong. I was a Christian. I handled it all with aplomb. After years of living in crises, our son stabilized–mostly–and we learned to navigate our new normal of being parents of a child with disabilities. We had another son, then a daughter.
Hibiclens. Nail scrubs. Gowning up. Pumping breast milk.
What was happening to me?
My mental state was so concerning to the nurses that they asked if I wanted psychiatric help.”
I’m distancing myself again, just trying to focus on the task of getting through this post…”the new normal of being parents of a child with disabilities”…where there is No Normal to be found!
The NICU info is reminding me of what we faced for 2 1/2months (mostly just me as my husband had to return to our home 250 miles away & my parents would usually watch my 2 year old & my other infant son, who’d been in the NICU for 10 days)…Once Brandon, Josiah’s twin, came “home” (to my parents’ house) the breast pump became a daily occurrence. I had to pump milk for 20 minutes after every feeding of Brandon & I’d take that accumulated milk with me to the hospital to feed Josiah (who had to be gavage fed through a tube in the nose for he was too weak to latch on). After Josiah’s heart surgery he was no longer medically allowed to have my milk so then I would pump milk for Brandon that I’d accumulate in the hospital fridge or freezers on the Pediatric Congenital Heart wing of the hospital & then pass to my parents to give to Brandon. I think I usually stayed bedside with Josiah once he’d had his heart surgery but much of that time has been blurred out & is not readily accessible for “total recall”. U of M had a breast pump room in the Pediatric Cardiology wing of the hospital so I was far from the only mom of a young baby/child battling the breast pump front…
“I know I need help.
I visit a practitioner specializing in stress and hormones.
With advice stemming from a naturopathic philosophy, I make progress back to the land of the living.
Am I cured?
My daughter has a case of unrepairable supraventricular tachycardia that has resulted in ambulance trips and unsuccessful ablations. My oldest son still is disabled. I live on the edge with an undercurrent of constant anxiety.“
I get a counselor who comes to our home when we still lived in Northern Michigan (we moved when the twins were a year and a half). I attempt to “process” various aspects of being a special needs parent…this counselor basically berates me for whining & tells me that I don’t know how good I have it & that most mothers in my shoes have been abandoned by their husbands so I just need to be thankful that I have an intact marriage!
Our pastor visits to offer “comfort” and asks what he could do to help. I tell him I could really use a friend. He practically yells at me “I Can’t Get You Friends!!!” He prays with me that one visit & then I’m basically housebound for a year and a half before we move (Josiah was hospitalized twice in his first year with life threatening RSV infections so I pretty much only venture out to appointments–a lifestyle that became pretty habitual beyond the “use by” date)…the last year of that time I live with our three boys in our home while my husband lives with my parents 250 miles away, working a new job as we attempt to sell our house by owner. Michael & I only get weekends together but connect by phone (I think this was pre-Internet in our home so no email, etc)…
I share some of my heartaches with a close relative who’d been providing support as they were able. They are tired of dealing with me & my issues so tell me “I can’t handle your neediness so I have to pull away.” It takes me years to regroup that rocky relationship for me emotionally & to learn to rebuild trust. I retreat even more into my emotional shell I try to lick my wounds as best as I am able.
My husband has ADHD & can only hang so long with complex topics, especially if we are having such talks after a long work day. I don’t have many/any places to “process” the magnitude of what I wrestle with in relation to my son’s special needs & advocating on his behalf. I share my frustration about these burdens & communication challenges with a pastor (I love my husband too much to lay huge amounts of details & baggage on him because if I don’t hold back sometimes I can push him into a mental/emotional overload & shutdown & he can get physically sick). The pastor seemingly berates me for my communication style & cautions me to be more concerned about my husband without offering advice or support as to how I might manage my needs in the equation. I feel overwhelmed by this criticism & lack of hearing my heart & retreat further…
I acquire reams of material in the process of gearing up for yet another special education battle. One hospital form reveals that an office staff person put my name in for investigation for possible medical abuse of my child (she thought I’d brought him unnecessarily to the hospital to get my own twisted needs met) because I’d asked her to watch him while I took a legal call that couldn’t be rescheduled (& I’d brought him for the first & only time to an “emergency” specialty appointment because he’d put something in his ear & the regular doc, who we’d already seen said we had to have it removed by the specialist) & was just around the corner from where my son was watching TV in the waiting room (& being young & autistic needed someone to keep an eye on him). I had no one else available from “our side” to be on that legal conference call nor attend appointments with us & was under huge stress from that special education case. I dealt with a few years of paranoia after this wondering if every aspect of my care for my child was under some type of scrutiny & if I was being secretly written up & investigated…
There are a few other issues I could mention but this gives a flavor of what that post brings up…& even attempting to write about this stuff relatively dispassionately is difficult…
“Adrenaline rushes occur every time someone sneezes.
But I’m much better – sometimes thriving, sometimes struggling. How do I keep going day after day? Here are my top tips for moms dealing with PTSD or adrenal fatigue:
While I hate the way PTSD makes me feel, believe it or not, I am grateful for it. Once a pull-yourself-up-by-the-bootstraps kind of girl, I now know what it is to fully rely on God in my weakness, and I can now comfort those who journey behind me.”
I’m sharing this author’s advice, not because I necessarily agree with nor act upon it, but since it may benefit anyone else who might read my post…
I do find the scriptures to be very beneficial, both in their written & in a worship format. I have been incorporating more scriptural meme-type images in some of my posts of late for I find the Word of God to bring Life & some of the imagery helps accentuate the truth…
Here are some scripture based songs of comfort I recently shared with a precious lady who is actively battling breast cancer…see this page for those conversations:
The #4 area (support group above) is one of particular weakness for me. I don’t have many outlets of a face-to-face nature where hashing these things out is possible. Years ago I used to participate obliquely in a message board site called Moms Online. It had boards on various health topics like Autism, ADHD, Congenital Heart, Urogenital Defects, Prematurity, Surgeries, ENT issues, Sleep Disorders, Learning Disabilities, etc. My issue was that I could rarely find anyone who dealt with more than two topics at a time. In the land of special needs parenting I found the constellation of Josiah’s needs to be beyond the realm of the other moms that were posting. Because these & other issues bled into each other it became less beneficial to “lurk” & virtually pointless to “post”…I guess that’s partly why I choose to write in a blog about some of these things now…
Well let’s see if anything in the comments section hits home:
One of the comments seems filled with anger & resentment so I won’t copy it here. I do relate in various ways to what that commenter shared. It is very difficult to have to continually “lay your life down” for another. I’m not that altruistic by nature, in fact a “spiritual gifting inventory” I took years ago put “servanthood” as my lowest trait! Being a special needs parent requires one to enter servanthood at an alarming rate & intensity…
“I’m so sorry for the agonizing anxiety of the fragile health needs in your family.
Thank you for sharing in such an understanding and sensitive way.
PTSD haunts me on many fronts…my past, my husband…sometimes my kids…
I tried to ignore it…and it chased me through nightmares…
I tried to explain it…and it cost me friends…
I tried to cover it up…and it forced its way into my brain through flashbacks…
I found a godly counselor…and it receded into the shadows…
Life is possible–although still precarious…”
This is heartbreakingly true & beautifully shared…I do relate in spirit to this comment…
Here is a comment by this post’s author to the one really struggling…
“Rachel Olstad on April 21, 2015 at 8:38 pm